Occupy DC on Strike!

Some disturbing news came out of DC today, the Occupy movement declared that they are on strike. The Official Statement came out this morning.

“We are sick of representing the 99% without adequate compensation. We pitch our tents, we hold clever signs, and we emphatically sit down for 9 hours a day without the usual luxuries the rest of the 99% enjoys every day. No more! No more are we, the willing one percent of the 99%,  going to occupy your streets for your benefit. From here on, we are officially on strike and will demonstrate as such!”

We even caught some word from an anonymous ninety-nine percenter that a Union is in the works. “We should’ve known all along, you can’t just expect to Occupy Wall Street or DC without some worker protection. I’ve been out here for six months, and haven’t received a damn thing.”

Unfortunately new “Strike Against Occupy” movement’s goals are about as vague as the Occupy Movement’s. This worries Occupy Wall Street, because there is no clear way for them to end Strike Against Occupy’s occupation-protest and persuade them to occupy for the right reasons.

There is some concern that the average individual will not be able to differentiate the new Strike Against Occupy protest from the Occupy movement itself. “Somehow we have to distinguish that we are the one percent of the 99% that is fighting the other one percent,” says David Higgins. A few have rearranged their tents into the shape of a hexagon, but the spirited symbolic gesture has gone largely unnoticed.

We do not know how this will turn out, but now the 99% has two percents to worry about

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About mkholmes25

Amateur theologian, musician, sports fan, etc. View all posts by mkholmes25

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